Lest I forget....

...when actually I really can't.

Well unless it got broke, hmmm, is that even proper english, I don't think so, but anyway, if it got broke then I really wouldn't forget and would actually be really sad but that is beside the point.

When love comes in the mail in the form of a usable piece of art from the heart and hands of a sweet friend it makes my day, week, month .... whenever I have coffee in a good mood.

(On bad days I drink from dark brown or black mugs and on regular days I drink from blue sky mugs.)

This is my happy day mug.

Made by saj. Thank you my sweet friend!

Wouldn't it make you happy too?!

Going back

I don't even really know where to start. Almost another month has gone by since I was last on here. And I miss it. I miss getting my thoughts out regularly but I have had no choice but to hold back for a bit. I have been working on getting orders out that have been nagging at me since spring and am so looking forward to not painting anything but what comes out of my head randomly. Not that I don't enjoy being booked...solid for two years now but I need a break to just get refocused and explore some of the ideas I have been stock piling.

Ok, and then there was the biggie. My spiritual journey. Over the last month I have been dealing with massive amounts of convictions and soul searching. Digging onto the Bible and seeking to know God's heart. This is a journey that has been refreshing and also kinda like getting hit by a cement truck.

I just hadn't had a real desire to read the Bible and really study and meditate for 10 years. Oh I have read here and there and looked a few things up and followed along with studies once in a while and also just read out of guilt too. But something snapped a while ago that has created a hunger in me like never before. And the convictions, I won't even get into what they are. Just a few months ago I would have thought I was crazy but that was where I was then so I know that every one had different convictions at different times and that is just how it is.

I do suppose if you poked and prodded I would talk about it in an e-mail but I am still on this discovery process.

Anyway, between painting, reading and trying to get life into a sort of routine and balance I have not let myself indulge in this here blog. This is my treat time.

And so rather than fill your ear with a pile of my thoughts (which I really really want to do) I really need to get caught up in the photo department first. So here we are going back a month to Canadian thanksgiving and the following two weeks! The last few weeks are still on the camera, I know, nuts! I used to load them on here every night! The task is daunting!

I really should have dug out the tripod!

Tea time for little friends.

First time really trying to keep her colouring in the lines. She is really abstract in most of her art so this blew my socks off!

Awww, yes!

We headed back to Edmonton the week after thanksgiving for a memorial service and I got to catch up with some old friends. This one is a very, very old friend...from birth kind of old, not age, we soooo are not there yet...and one who is so much like me in thoughts and interests it freaks me out but also makes me love her more! Oh and she doodles these great little viking comics!

It was beautiful weather and the leaves had all fallen off the trees so.....it couldn't be resisted!

Dave and I.

And I got to sneak out again to visit another old friend. She does amazing graphic work and I have promised to indulge in some of her work someday....so if you live in her area you should check her out! Ahhh, how I miss our pretty coffee dates and 'gotta get out and pour out my guts and get a good vent out' coffees and well, there just isn't anything like surrounding yourself with great friends is there?!

Ready to hit the road.

Goodbye snuggles were absorbed.

Mmmmm......

And back on the road with a gazillion potty breaks.

A trip that used to take 7 1/2 hours now takes 10.

But even though the trips are longer and somewhat brutal they are worth it. Seeing family and friends is so good and getting the see the stars in a clear black sky on the side of the road in the middle of no where on the 187th pee stop....totally worth it in an Awesome way!

Just cause it's here

I realize it has been oh, ages since I last posted. Not that I haven't wanted too. I do!! I have a ton to get out and a ton of photos. Fall, winter then fall again, a trip, a reno and a few other things.

However time is not on my side and sleep is needed so it has been winning!

I was going to upload the pictures from the last three weeks off my camera and thought I would get a few on here before I did that.

So here are a few shots found in an archived post from weeks ago when it was still nice.

And I will save saying anything of any relevance for a later date. I am crunching this out in a squeak of a spare moment and need to get back to what I working on here!

I also have two monkeys climbing on me making this rather impossible and another little once gazing up at me with big eyes and a mouth full of fist!

Cheerio!

Getting on track and on a side note, it is SNOWING!

As you may have noticed I took a break.

After writing the last post I sat back and read what I wrote and realized that I needed to make some changes around home. That and sitting reading your emails and comments, I had a lot of thinking to do.

But anyway .... first and foremost I want to thank all of you who commented and wrote me in e-mails.

Thank you for your support and also for the few kicks in the butt that I needed.

I cried and laughed and felt many virtual hugs, and connections so thank you from the bottom of my heart. Sharing and hearing what you had to say did amazing things for me.

You touch my heart!

Having this blog work both directions is something I never could have imagined just a few years ago. Sometimes I think I am loosing it and then you guys all together make things somehow seem clearer. I love the perspectives and well, you are awesome!

I really, really want to e-mail you all back and write personal letter and share my heart but at the same time I am really focusing on my home. The whole home, including the people.

I still have yet to write my thank you cards for the gifts we received for Hudson. Someday.

However I want to tell you that I have embarked on a journey and am struggling to keep on track. Maybe after 28 days it will feel like a habit but I kind of doubt it.

So this last week and a bit has been a time that I have thought and read and prayed and played and cleaned and sorted and prayed some more and then realized that I needed to clean again.

I am still no good there!

Why does this come so hard to me?!

Dave packed all my canvases and paints away in the furnace room so I wouldn't be so tempted to walk over, plop on the floor and paint whenever I get an idea. I do feel rather itchy and a little nerve tweakish though, my body and brain ache for the smell of fresh canvas and stinky paints and my fingers twitch for a brush.

I know I am weird, this is just my thing, ok.

Now I am rewarding myself with time to paint when I am done what I need to do. The house will not be perfect but things that need to be done will be done.

So Dave and I have been talking and cleaning and trying to get some order around here. We have purged and hid boxes of kids stuff out of sight.

We are working towards our day to day life being simpler and less cluttered so our minds can be too.

I know some of you say I am too hard on myself and I know sometimes I am, you are right, but you know sometime we need to reevaluate and we need to refocus and sometimes we have our priorities out of line. We need to get hard on ourselves for changes to happen.

I am going to give up custom orders after the ones I have sitting here are done and maybe after Christmas pick up again.

I want to do some experimenting and exploring of my ideas. I want to sew. I need a little more freedom and a little less stress. I don't want the nagging pressure in the back of my head of jobs committed to and not completed. I love the work but need a break.

I want just to do what I want when I feel like it rather than it be a job.

So if you have an order in, don't worry, it is coming!

If you don't, well, please wait until after Christmas. Sorry, I need the next few months.

Sleep helps too.

Really, really helps.

Dave has also helped me see that I play around too much. Not just with the kids but I putz. I don't know how but I don't get stuff done and then Dave comes home and the dishes are piled high, the toys are everywhere and the laundry is stinking up the washer. What the heck did I do all day?!

I know I clothed the kids, brushed hair on a good day, read them books, made meals and changed a gazillion diapers, wiped a few bigger bums, went for a walk and broke up a fight over coloured plates, nursed and bathed and checked my e-mail. Maybe did a little text messaging but really didn't do much else.

Hmmmm, that actually sounds like a halfway busy day. Somehow in the thick of it the time just disappears and then Dave is home and rather than plunking on the floor to wrestle and giggle with the kids he has to do dishes so we can eat, do the laundry so we have clothes to wear and then next thing you know it is bedtime and there is no room on the floor to read books with the kids so he picks up stuff while the kids fall asleep on the couch waiting.

This blows!

(whew, that was also long winded)

If I can just somehow get a schedule nailed down I want to. I want our home to be halfway decent for Dave when he comes home. I want him to be able to relax and play with the kids every night. I want him to have down time!

We did well for a few days but then it came to a head again last night.

Today was better again. Maybe it helped that we spent half the day out with Mrs. Wilson and Kami and the other half in a Bible study class and shopping but we did make efforts here too.

I realize it is small changes that need to be implemented.

Structure is my weakness.

Just a little goes a long way. I am embracing this. Getting up at the same time. Doing the same routine as we get ready for the day.

Working towards daily flips of laundry and loads of dishes.

All meals at the table, well, ok, we will still have picnics around the house but we are going to aim for picnics at the table. Not sure how I will trick them into this one. But at least I will work on keeping the table clean so they can happen.

I am not giving up time with the kids. I do know how important this is but it cannot be all that I do all day long. They do play together and I can get off my duff and do stuff rather than sit there and watch them while I sit rummaging through the thoughts in my head.

I can very well do the rummaging while I do laundry.

Anyway, I am reading a few books, mainly my Bible every day and challenging my self to some personal changes.

I know we will be fine. We'd survive anyway but I really want balance and I am finally seeing the light and feeling within my grasp.

Now off for that much needed sleep so WE CAN DO THIS!!!

xoxo

Thanks again guys!

Daydreamer

Sometimes I am inspired.

Inspired by what others write. In books, on blogs, and random clips in papers or magazines I read things that get me going. Sometimes I agree, sometimes I disagree, sometimes it gives me something to think about and sometimes I want to write because of what I read.

Recently I have read a few friends blogs and realized that they were all writing things that I have been dealing with myself. Things that I haven't been facing well and so I have decided to try and get it out now.

I seem to be at a pretty low point right now. I don't want to talk about it but I am trying to face and deal with where I am so I want to talk about it at the same time.

I don't think I have depression. I have been there before. Not caring at all about a single thing. Feeling nothing. Wanting to feel anything but not having the energy to care.

I do feel, I do care, a lot, I am just tired, really, really, tired.

So tired. I can cry. Any time. A lot. I want to do so much but don't want to move at the same time.

I was just reading a friends blog and she was talking about her relationship a little and I realized that I could have written what she wrote.

I feel stupid sharing this but at the same time it is going on here.

I am annoyed. Annoyed with Dave and with the kids and with family and everyone. I actually planed on getting mad at Dave the other day when I could only blame myself.

I had the whole morning to get out the door for the kids field trip and dilly dallied the hours away. By the time it was time to leave I remembered that the truck was out of gas and that I needed money to pay for the field trip. We were down to the wire getting out the door and Kaitlyn kept changing outfits over and over. Then I had to change a diaper and find shoes and pack the snack and find a clean bottle to put water in and next thing you know we were going to be late if we didn't leave RIGHT NOW!!

I was already planning the call in my head to Dave, "You know I had this trip planned, why didn't you gas up the truck, why didn't you get me money, you know how hard it is for me to get out the door and get everyone buckled up and, and, and....."

And then I went to grab my keys from the key bowl and saw that there was a 20 dollar bill tucked in with my keys and a some change for a coffee.

I started to feel bad.

I went out to the truck with the kids and put the key in the ignition. The gas tank was full. I started to cry.

It was my own stupid fault that I was rushing last minute, loosing my cool and pushing to get out the door THIS MINUTE!

I could have planned ahead and had time to spare and just been pleasantly surprised by Dave's thoughtfulness.

Now I felt like an idiot and had to call and thank him over and over and then had the whole drive out to the country to think about how I let things go in my head.

I get annoyed with him over anything. Like the garbage can getting full. It's not his fault yet I am annoyed with him. What is wrong with me?!

I can take out the garbage. I have two legs!

I get annoyed with the kids and them wanting to sit on my lap when I just want to be in my own head or doodling in a sketch book and I don't want to be bumped.

I am thankful that I do have rational thoughts and catch myself in these moments for the most part, not all the time but I do know what I am doing. Then I get mad at myself. I want to just love and cuddle all the time, but I don't want to and sometimes I want to be alone and then when I am I want to not be alone and be with them all the time and.......I just don't understand myself!!

So anyway, I drove out to the pumpkin patch thinking about how stupid I am in my head and vowing to not be so stupid and wishing I could just figure out how to be more positive.

I do love it when the kids have fun. I wouldn't have gone if it wasn't for them. Well I wouldn't have been invited since it was organized by and for home schoolers but you know what I am saying. I would rather stay in bed with a notebook all day than go out to the pumpkin patch.

Then when I really think about it I don't know why I would want to stay in bed. I would miss a lot of photo ops and giggles and fresh air and crunching of fall leaves.

But I almost need toothpicks to prop my eye lids open through it all. For the last month at least I have felt almost nauseous with exhaustion.

You ask then why the heck am I sitting up here at midnight typing when I could be cashing in on that much needed sleep?

Well I do need time to get this head stuff out. Also Ethan is sick and up every few minutes wanting water. Poor little guy had a mild fever since last night and it finally broke this afternoon but has left him cranky and tired. Fighting something he is.

Anyway, I did want to have a good time and put on a good face and chased the kids around.

Sent them off on a ride and then hung out in the kiddy coral until some of their (and my) friends arrived.

Then off we went to plod through the corn maze.

I hate mazes. But somehow I end up doing them every year.

I am quite glad to follow along in the background and leave the fun up to everyone else.

Maybe I would find it fun if I wasn't so tired but all I wanted to do was sit in the shade and not think and not get my flip flops all muddy and my back all sore from carrying a baby.

I never told a soul. I hope they forgive me when and if they read this.

Because I did still have fun. Really. Taking a few pictures. This always makes me happy.

And talking with a few friends. Even though I find that when my mind is elsewhere I tend to blab on about who knows what and don't really follow much of what is going on around me.

It is a wonder some day that I have friends. I must be so annoying!

However at the same time I find friends even if they don't say much and I don't either to be like a good medicine. Like silent comfort just cause they are there.

My poor kids. I wish I could just get out of my head and focus already! I want to get in their heads and know what they are thinking about and not be so distracted!

I am glad I have photos to look back on, it keeps it real for me.

Though I think too about how easy it would have been to just post these pictures and say something along the lines of ....what a wonderful beautiful sunny perfect fall day we spent at the pumpkin patch. Because really it was!

And at the time was into it, I thought, until I look back over the whole week, month, year.

Blagh!

Somehow I find a way to be there and in the moments sort of. It is something I strive for but in my head I am also a million miles away. It is like there is the front part of my head that talks and sees and functions normally and then there is this dark little back room in my head where all this chaos goes on behind the scenes.

I try to close the door on the dark little room and just have fun and I think I really do have fun but sometimes the door swings open and I have to fight it with all my might to get it shut again.

Having kids often forces me to push that dark door closed. They just know how to cheer and brighten a day no matter what. Their skin is so soft and so kissable. However even as I am smooching them endlessly I still find my brain drifting off to daydream about a new kitchen or something dumb like that and I have to snap back into the moment.

I tend to avoid what I know I need to do around the house by finding fun things to do even if my mind isn't in it. I focus a LOT on fun.

These kids, they bring me to my knees shaking in sobs as I put them to bed. I feel as though I am failing them so bad.

Just this past week in my new moms Bible study group the leader brought up how we as moms are always hard on ourselves and never give ourselves credit enough.

I don't think I am too hard on myself at all. I let myself get away with way too much.

I have been talking a lot about the state of my house and how I need to get it in order lately and this is only part of it.

I cry because I want to be better. I want to teach the kids more about Jesus. I want them to see Him in my life. I want them to see order and peace. I want them to see routine and stability.

I cry because I fear that all they see is the opposite.

I don't hug and kiss my husband enough.

I don't make good healthy suppers enough.

I don't sing enough or laugh enough or wash the floors enough....it has been months. Seriously.

It is this bad.

I don't just feel like I am failing as a wife and mother and friend. I know I am.

I am vowing to change this. As I clean the house bit by bit it is as if I am picking up the pieces.

Geting back the better wife and mom.

I have vowed to put the energy into friendships once again too. I miss having close friends. Ones who I can have fun with and call in the middle of the night if I need too. I miss going out for pretty coffee with girlfriends.

Putting energy into friendships is hard. You have to grow them. Invest time and space in your head. It is hard yet so rewarding.

I am trying. It is a process.

It really helps to have children who beg to see their friends and want go to the park to fly kites.

So we did. I am glad. Not that I was great company with my thoughts in my head in the dark little room at the back but I am trying to keep that door closed.

Live in the moments.

I felt bad leaving the house but I hadn't been in it all day anyway. This is how it goes. I sat outside watching the kids play for hours and doodled. I am so good at finding distractions.

Art has become one of those distractions.

I don't know now if I want anyone to read or comment on this. Maybe I have said too much although I know I am only showing the scratches on the surface. I hate all the deep stuff going on in me right now. When I look around things seem fine. When I close my eyes they aren't.

I feel anxious with all I think I need to do. The list is so long.

I am so tired.

When I play and hug and kiss my kids sometimes I feel like I am just going through the motions. I love them so much it breaks my heart that I can let myself be so distracted by my own thoughts. None bad, don't worry there, they are just stupid thoughts, like....."that shadow looks so cool , I wonder if I used such and such colours and this size of canvas if I could recreate that and that reflection there, oooo, that would be cool in a painting...''.

I swear! I think of the most useless junk while my kids are babbling out the most adorable stories and then I snap back to present and realized that I missed the part where the frog got kissed by the princess and he is already a prince again!

Anyway, after all this I don't want you to be freaking out. We do have a lot of fun and I do have great moments and sometimes great days. It just seems that they are way better when there is consistantly great sleep and well it has now been 4 1/2 years since that has happened.

I am a little loopy.

And I know I think way too much too and maybe if I didn't I would be better off, who knows.

I don't know what else to say.

I guess I'll leave it here for now and go to bed.

Seems like a lousy ending but I am zonked and am fading.

Night.

Sulking in the sun

I just found this in the archives. A post unposted because something else came up.

A face we have been seeing a lot of. Seems to be a part of the four year old stage going on around here. Every mood is in the extremes. So happy....so sad.

Ahh, the life of a four year old.

Summer memories

I was just cruising back over my last few posts and realized that I missed posting most of summer. Well I knew I wasn't around and all but I also forgot about a lot of photos. So Nana, this is for you! Also for my blog to book. I want to sit back someday and review so these need to get in there.

These are photos from the last month or so and are completely random moments and have no connections from one to the next for the most part. They really are just moments or things I want to store away in my brain and are my visual cues to those memories.

So here are a few things I want to remember about our summer.

New shoes for me but worn more so far by Kaitlyn.

Evening strolls.

Play time in the dirt.

Visits with friends.

Berry picking as the sun set with Dave.

Wild grass in the breeze.

Berry picking some more.

With Aunt Deb and my mom.

Watching Kaitlyn and Ethan get in on the picking. 1/2 Saskatoon berries, 1/2 choke cherry.

Saskatoon sundays, deep fried mushrooms and Greek wings at D's Place.

The fry shack that deserves to get on TV for its daily cut fresh fries, fresh home made pizza's and amazing chili anything. Mmmm!

Getting fresh produce from the market gardens.

And taking in the scenery of the valley on the way to the lake.

Checked out the Folk Festival.

Sat with friends.

Hung out with our kids.

Did some shopping.

Watched some art in progress.

Ate snow cones.

Visited little friends.

And old friends. Not 'old' old, but you know long time old.

Hit the splash park in style.

And cooled off in the froggy pool.

Watched my bro's paint our house. This reminds me that we still owe them $!

Sat in mud puddles.

Watched the flowers bloom. Late. August.

Got a little guitar. As soon as Kaitlyn got it home she opened the box in front of her, struck a few cords and sang. "Put your money in my box!!"

She then requested that we head down town so she could make "lots" of money.

Had canvas come in that was on back order for two months.

Got the order out.

Snuggled the babe on cool days. Thank you mamatucci for the delicious little outfit!

Spent evenings at the beach in search of my sanity.

I always find it there.

Think maybe I should just live there already?!

Did a little educational touristy stuff. Visited the old trading post. Preserved in the dog sled days era.

Hung out listening to the birds.

And just being.

Played ball with friends and family.

Enjoyed being together.

And apparently hanging out tongues. Notice it is only my siblings doing it. Interesting.

Goofed off.

Loved a little.

Enjoyed the outdoors.

And siting around.

Celebrating our 6th wedding anniversary and drawing on the walls.

Caught Kaitlyn out taking the Gnome and a few pairs of shoes for a walk.

Stole a smile.

Soaked up the sun over many naps on the picnic table.

Painted something for myself.

Loved it.

Painted something random. (for sale)

36" x 36" each.

Bathed Hudsy in the tubsy.

Dude is big!!!

(And I loooooooove it!)

Took naps in the hammock.

And under the trees.

Played in the sand.

Painted in the shade.

Nibbled little toes.

Had picnics with Great Grands.

My Grands, but my kids Greats.

Hung out with aunties and cousins and sisters,

uncles, brothers and more cousins.

Stopped out of the blue at random parks to play.

Baked in the heat.

And went back to the beach.

Doodled and daydreamed by the lake.

Came back to the city and did laundry.

Went to church.

Had convictions set in.

Working on living those convictions and making commitments to them.

Took sunset strolls.

With my Hudson on my chest.

Loving every stinking moment with this baby!

Got the old point and shoot back. Can you tell? (Sorry for the crappy shots!)

Enjoyed flowers.

Didn't enjoy the bugs in our house though.

Saw the flowers start to change.

Fall is coming.

Took goofy picture's of Hudson. He's cool with it.

Hung out on my parents new deck at the lake.

Dealt with 4 year old logic and arguments.

Lounged around in quiet.

Shared special moments.

Cherished them and locked them away some place special.

Made faces at the neighbours cat.

These photo's really hit on the highlights.

There were low points too and we are still dealing with some.

Hitting the deer in July ended up doing the truck in and we had to buy a newer one.

Then there are my issues. I know I sound like a broken record when I talk about the house and getting it clean. I have been saying this since we had kids, ok, since before we had kids.

I am cluttered in my head and it spills over into real life.

This has become a huge issue. The kids are cranky and Dave is snappy and I am anxious when the house is such a mess. When it is clean the kids play better, are calmer and happier. Dave comes home and is happier and relaxed and I am cheerful. I feel that I am failing my family, myself, and God. I cannot serve or entertain or anything like this. It is pathetic.

So I am resolving to change. I don't know how but I am sitting down and creating a strategy.

If I am going to do this homeschool thing I have to get my act together.

Not only that I want my kids to have peace in their lives not chaos.

I need to change.

Now.

Anyway, I got off on a tangent there, dang cluttered brain!

So back to the post!

These are a few of the moments that I wanted to remember from the last month.

Back to regular programming soon.

Cheers!

Farewell to a dear friend

Yesterday I lost one of my best friends. She was 94 years old.

My heart is heavy but I also know that she is with her Lord and Saviour and that is where she has longed to be for many years.

I owe credit in bunch loads to this woman for inspiring and helping me to grow into the person I am now. She taught me so much about unconditional love and acceptance and grace and patience and dedication and has for the last 10 years held a very deep and special place in my heart.

I don't even know where to start with describing what she meant to me. I know she wouldn't want the world to know all her trials so I'll just brief a bit of it.

She was amazing! Done.

Ok, well, this is tough, (swallowing hard) I just know words wont get out what I feel.

Marion lived a very full life. She had office jobs and dental nurse jobs, was a technician (just like me) and was an artist. She painted around the world and I LOVE her work! Especially this one of the ocean, it is so raw and endless. Oh and the one that she did overlooking a bay with a building on the cliff in the distance, she captured the warm sun glow perfectly! She never raved about herself and was so meek about it but she really was so talented. She did silk screening and did her own dark room developing of photography. She created stunning pergamano cards and had the most incredible unique stone jewelry.

She raised her two children while traveling and being a busy forces wife and still managed to be creative.

In her 70's or 80's, I cannot remember now, but she walked the wall of China and went to the Amazon! She grabbed moments and took trips. She did things she wanted to and pursued her interests. She never let herself get 'old' and was always active, even driving her own car up until a few years ago. I want to be like her!

In so many ways I felt that we were kindred hearts. We would sit and talk about growing up in the meeting (church) and read and sing together. Then over a cup or 4 of tea and cookies we would and talk and talk about anything from marriage and relationships to art techniques, child raising, flowers and politics.

There was not a topic we didn't broach, well, ok, maybe a few but what I am saying is that we had an open relationship. It was so liberating and relaxed. I never felt that there were over 60 years between us. It was just a really easy friendship. Gaaa, I loved that woman!

There is more but I am a little emotional so that is all for now.

Tonight I am raising my glass to Marion!

xoxo

Home schooling and laundry

I know, I know, I swore I would never do this to my children. Home school.

When I look back on the years that I was home schooled I really have a hard time pushing ahead with it. I loved school as a kid, especially the lower grades. I loved the projects, the experiments, the recourse's for learning, the books, crafts and the field trips. Didn't care much for all the kids but loved my teachers. Sooooo, deciding to home school was a tough decision.

My home school years were not my favourite. However looking back I guess going back to school after that wasn't my favourite either but I do have fond memories of the private high school I went to.

What I am getting at is well, it will be a year to year decision for us and I am pretty sure that they will go to school I am just not sure when.

So we decided to recreate the fun things at home and make sure we are very active in social activities. Turns out that with the home schooling group here we will be seeing more kids more often then if Kaitlyn were in the private school for pre school so I think this year will be all good! Ya, know what I am sayin.

Anyway we ended up turning a corner of the playroom into a class room and it has been a hit.

We are now almost two weeks into our schedule and it is a blast. We start the day with putting the date on the calendar and then map the forecast. Next up we do a work book or two. Working on letters and numbers, mazes and puzzles. Then we have story and snack time and then recess.

Next up we do a craft. Sometimes this is just coloring or building stuff with play dough or we dig something out of my surprise craft box. (the favourite) Those creations are up on the wall to show off to daddy later.

Next up is singing and then free play.

Not much really but Kaitlyn loves every moment and begs to do school throughout the day. So rather that following the 1-2 day/2 hour public school schedule we are doing it every day and suffering through begging and pleading on weekends to "Please lets do more school!!!"

For some reason I think this just might change over the years into moping and whining about not wanting to do school so I am going with it!

The reason we didn't put Kaitlyn in pre school outside the home?

Well, hmmm. We almost did. I even went to the orientation and met the teacher. The reason in the end that we didn't was because it was going to cost us almost 4 figures to put Kaitlyn in for two days a week and if we only did one day (2 hrs) a week it was half price but still quite hefty. (this is at the private school a few blocks away) Then there was fund raising on top of this and I DO NOT DO THIS!

I hate it!

So rather than pester family and friends to buy home stuff, magazines, books, chocolates and whatever else (I am totally ok with being pestered by others for this stuff though....bring on the mag subscriptions, I'll buy!) I would rather spend a tiny amount of money and not miss the moments with my kids.

Moments like watching Kaitlyn open and close her mouth with every chop to the piece of paper she does with her scissors. chomp, chomp, chomp............

Ghaaa, I could just squeeze her!

And I really want to be a part of their early development, all of it! I am not ready to let them go and they love to be together and I think they will be away from me enough with bible class and sunday school and, and, and.....

Anyway, that and also that our kids are small still, really they are, I cannot imagine them out of the house already!

And I get to go on ALL the field trips and nature walks!

Even if they sometimes only take us to the laundromat.

We did turn it into a teachable moment.

Kaitlyn and Ethan took turns counting the money and putting it in the machines. Then they got to put in the detergent and start them up.

Then the machines started to spin and a vortex opened up....

.....and Kaitlyn and Ethan were standing so close.....

...it sucked them right in...

....AAAGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.........

and we got to learn about the dimensions of laundry!

Just kidding, these photo's were just me messing with F stop and ISO settings, I couldn't help but post them and make something up.

Really we learned a little and after sitting around board and running around with blankets for capes we walked next door to the grocery store for a few things.

When we came back the laundry was done and K and E helped to fold their blankets.

So that is how we started our homeschooling adventure. Something I swore I would never do and here I am with preschoolers eating my words and having a blast.

chomp, chomp...........

Art and mindless chatter

I have a lot of posts swirling in my head. You know how you talk to yourself in your head but it is like you are telling a story to a friend?

Am I the only one who talks to imaginary friends in my head?

It does make me sound smart...to myself anyway.

I guess I could talk directly to myself but that would probably just sound arrogant in my head.

I used to talk to friends in my head when I was younger. I would just pretend they were there and chatter on inside. Then I got the blog. I get to talk to anyone who cares or dares to stop by now. It is kinda neat, kinda fun and creepy all at once.

So when I go for long stretches without getting on here and getting it out I find that the dialogue in my head once again starts up.

No relation to what I have just said, written, whatever, I was really going to say a bunch of other stuff but got interrupted by my daughter who got the badminton birdie stuck in the rafters downstairs while on her home school lunch break.

Whew! That was long winded!

So now that my mind is blank never mind whatever I was going to say and here are a few projects of late completed.

The one above is 6" x 6" and was just something I doodled up with some left over paint from the project below.

30" x 30" custom order.

10" x 20"

Finally the boot painting is done. When I paint for myself it seem to take a year to get the finishing touches done.

And that is it.

Questions to throw out there.

How does your inner dialogue work?

Do you talk directly to yourself?

Do you have an imaginary friend or just talk randomly into the air?

Or do you talk to your friends in your head as if they were in the room with you?

Am I the only one who thinks about this mindless stuff?